In the olden days, virginity was a big thing, It was something that was really celebrated and even though social media was already in existence 5 years ago and things were changing drastically worldwide I knew I deserved to be celebrated for holding on until marriage. Yes, it wasn’t just by my effort alone but also by the will of Allah… Alhamdulillah…
I didn’t want the serious kind of celebration seen in movies, I wanted my husband to make me feel special, I wanted a wedding night gift! “C’mon brother! In as much as it is not a trade by batter thing, I am giving you that which I have protected all my life, it is only okay for you to make me feel good and comfortable..” These thoughts I always had before marriage…
But how do I even begin to tell this brother that I wanted a gift, it won’t be a surprise anymore now?! I wouldn’t feel good about it again now. Maybe I should tell a friend to tell him? “Roll eyes” that would really be an awkward conversation… This is hard! But I want a wedding night gift! (This was me before Marriage o).
I couldn’t bring myself to talk about this or even anything related to intimacy although about two weeks to the wedding he sent me a book that had to do with intimacy through his sister and guess what? It had nothing to do with wedding night gifts (Laughs).
I accepted my fate and took my mind of the gift thing. 2 days to our wedding I realized wait! If I can’t muster the courage to tell him I want a gift, I might as well just get him one. That would be me sending an Indirect message to him Abi? That evening, I placed an emergency order for a wristwatch he had always wanted and I wrote 20 different things I liked about him in a DIY box I made…I mean anything for my gift (Jokes).
After the wedding, I was just paranoid, it was like I was forced to get married. The reason why I don’t know (brides feel this way, don’t be shocked). While he was trying to get me to ease up, he said wait, I have something for you… I was going to say “wait! Isn’t it suppose to be later I.e after the marriage has been consummated”? But something said ‘will you keep quiet, what if it isn’t a gift..’
He then came back with a beautiful box that said ‘Thank you (my name) for marrying me…(like I was doing him a favor).
Just before I opened it, I picked mine and gave it to him as well (we both smiled) but he insisted I opened mine first, It was a box of jewelry with our Initials, a body gift set and a very long note that I soaked with my tears…
I asked how he thought of getting a gift and he said, he came across the idea in an article he read before we got married…
Good gracious Lord blesses the person who wrote that article…
I honestly didn’t know why I really wanted a gift but to be really honest, it was a good Idea, it started up a conversation, I was more relaxed and more wifey (winks). One way for sure to help each other relax is by gifting each other. It definetly works.
So If you are a wedding Night person like me, shy to talk about it and you think your partner is oblivious to so many things, Please look for away to hint him because it really helped.
It’s been 5 years of Marriage and Alhamdulillah.
Feel free to let me know if you are like me and you can as well suggests wedding night gift in the comment section…