Typical of a soon to be bride is to fill her box with new underwears and lingeries, “We are going to the husband’s house, everything must be new now and I can finally wear lingeries…”
Hmmm, it’s supposed to be an overnight change right? No! And this only tends to prove difficult because we have failed to build our self Images over the years, Why do you have to wait till you are married to feel sexy? To look sexy for your own self? Why can’t you wear lingeries in your own house? Or at least your own room? Why should wearing something as comfy and as light like a lingerie only be for a man?
Before marriage, most ladies get very insecure, A lady who has had stretch marks all her life, now feels the need to either want to scrub it off overnight or begins to plan step by step of how she will go about layering up in her husband’s house…
I am yet to meet someone like me, that has confidently said “Na stretch marks oo, no be person I kill, I will look my best even with this stretch marks and Habibi, you will not only like it, you will compliment it….” (My husband shouldn’t see this #laughs) but anyways, this isn’t to say oh, I have always been excited about my stretch marks or stretch marks is one of the best things to have in the world, because it honestly isn’t….
But will just sit down wallowing? Because you have stretch marks or keloids now, You shouldn’t feel sexy anymore? *Bell rings* IT’S TIME TO WORK ON OURSELVES…
And here are some tips I used, so I hope it will help you too…
Tip #1:
Sister meet yourself: have you ever met a sister before and she you ask her about herself and she goes: I don’t even know jare… That right there must change… You have to move from, I don’t know me, To I know me…wake up, look into the mirror acknowledge whatever you find negative and pat yourself in the back for all positives… Shine your light on the positives, the interesting thing about looking into the mirror to meet yourself is that you also meet your body… Yea! We look into the mirror far more than anyone is looking at us, we are so used to our own features that we don’t even realize how beautifully we have been created, take your time to stare at yourself beautifully without allowing that negative voice in your head to be an obstacle…
Let me warn you, that annoying voice in your head might win for sometimes, but don’t give up, I promise I am a testimony, I went from only seeing my big stomach to seeing my very fresh legs e.t.c
So yea, meet yourself genuinely…
Tip #2:
Wear sexy clothes: Yea! You don’t have to be married to do these things, I get you won’t be comfortable wearing them around your house if you live with your parents… My dear, you can always do this in your room… Something about lingeries is that they automatically do something to your brain…They stick on your body well and you begin to feel, “just look at the package”.
N.B: Again that Yeye voice will want to ruin the moment by whispering things like See your big stomach, or see your flat chest…
I have over time learnt to reply it…. See your small stomach, Ermmm, Excuse me, is it your stomach? Or someone is getting jealous of my stomach now… And again I promise, it works…
Tip #3:
Talk to God: I think people underestimate how powerful having a conversation with God is, Even though I wasn’t a size 6, I had a friend who was a size 6 but still didn’t feel good about herself, I would constantly say, this life shaaa… Me I want to be like her while she claims she wants to add fat in the right places… Anyways, dear God, help me love me and help me understand that you have created me in the best of Images, so I could rock whatever with so much confidence… Walaaaaa! Here we are… I promise I am not one of the 91% that aren’t confident in their skin…
What have I been trying to say? If you don’t love your body now chances are that you won’t when you get married as well, so why even wait until you get married? Get use to the You, you have imagined as a wife, for you might not even have the chance to finally meet that you, so do it now, if it’s lingerie that makes you feel all sexy, rock them now, if it’s perfume, candles, mini skirts, makeups whatever it is, purchase them now because hey, it’s time, its time to be comfortable being you….
I hope I made sense… Thank you.