A SOFTNESS THAT ENDS WITH BITTERNESS.

A friend once asked, “how come you are almost never disappointed?”.”Haha.what do you mean? I am human, of course, i get disappointed”. I responded and she laughed and said: “Bkay you know what I mean”.

The honest truth is, I don’t enjoy a tensed atmosphere, a sad face, a gloomy mood or a negative energy.so what will put me in that situation asides mother nature, I avoid.

Expecting too much from people will only make me sad really.I have experienced this a couple of times and I didn’t like it all. Dissapointments can be mentally draining and when your mental state is been tempered with, there is going to be an issue with your body system for the rest of the day.

I can’t even deal. I don’t get to the point of screaming “I am dissapointed in you”. If you are giving me signs, I take a step back. If you have been good all these while ( I still put it at the back of my mind that you are human and anything could happen at anytime). If you do unexplainable stuff, I try to give you reasons as to why it happened. If i can’t find any, then I wish you all the best in life but it doesn’t necessarily change my attitude towards you.

But if mother nature decides to throw things my way, things i can’t handle and are meant to get to me. I just try to sleep. I don’t wallow. I try not to scream whyyyy???? I try not to get frustrated and yea sometimes i feel i am not normal, I would often tell my self “scream” it’s okay to scream, until i see people in a drained state and then i go “thank you God” because i really can’t imagine me in that state.

Alot of people say, people like me hold grudges alot, not at all, I can’t even stand keeping you on my mind the whole day, I wouldn’t get to sleep and c’mon that’s me giving you a part of me you don’t deserve. I only think we might have trust issues.we don’t trust people a 100 percent, so when they do crazy stuff, we are like “it’s not new keep showing yourself, so moving on” and the only time we wallow is when we have trusted a 100 percent and then the person dissapoints.which can be rare.

Another thing about people like me is that we tend to appeeciate little things alot because we never expect people to get us gifts (for example). So when they do we tend to be shocked and super excited.

So yea, I don’t expect too much and even when you choose to temper with the little that i am expecting,then all the best,there is less i can do really. Wallowing wouldn’t solve the problem instead add to it..

“To expect too much is to have a sentimental view of life life and this is a softness that ends in bitterness.”- Flannery O’connor

And when I do things for people, I make sure I am doing my scale of good deeds to increase and hope God rewards, I mean isn’t that the Ultimate form if reward? I’m usually okay with “thank you” from the person.

This how i remain happy and when l am not laughing and being sacarstic,then I am either sick or super tired.

Live Happy,Stay Happy.

And that’s it guys, kindly let me know what you think in the comment section.